TAHOE/TRUCKEE, Calif. — ¡Mama Mía! In the very short lifetime of my two small girls we have put down our dog, watched two grandmothers pass away and lost a few friends to ski accidents. I am not affiliated with any church in particular and as a result I always struggle with ways to talk to my girls about death. Is there an easy answer?
Let's put your pagan spirit at rest by saying this is the perfect time of year to address such a dilemma. If we turn our attentions toward México and take advantage of our local heritage we can easily pay tribute to our dearly departed with a wonderful festival: el Día de los Muertos! Granted these are a people heavily governed by their Catholic ways, and El Festival de las Calaveras (as it is also known) has spread roots throughout the church; however, the rest of us heathens can simply take what we like and toss the rest at very little moral expenditure. After all, The Day of the Dead began as an ancient Aztec celebration and many people today continue to debate its existence as a cultural tradition rather than a religious affair.
If you are lucky enough to be in México from Oct. 31 to Nov. 2 you can partake in a more public spectacle at the local cemetery, but if you are stateside you can celebrate the homecoming of your loved ones with a private ofrenda or home altar covered in offerings. El Día de los Muertos is a time to laugh in death's face, mock it, have fun with it, but also a time to give thanks for the lives of those we miss. It's a time to share memories, laugh and cry. Sugar skulls decorated with colorful frosting, pan de muerto (bread of the dead), bunches of marigolds, even hot chocolate help turn grief into acceptance. The belief is that the dead visit their families and enjoy their favorite foods, drinks, music, games, whatever has been laid out for them at the ofrenda while the living enjoy each other's company. This is togetherness and family at its best!
“The Festival of the Bones” by Luis San Vicente and “Clatter Bash” by Richard Keep are two terrific children's books that will help you learn a bit more through a great story and beautiful pictures followed by recipes and ideas. A website with really great visuals and tons more info can be found at mexconnect.com
However, this “easy answer” doesn't address the issue of where did everyone go? From where are they returning? Are they still alive somewhere else? The Bahá'í Faith is an international vision of spirituality that may help to answer questions without choosing sides. It basically takes all the best of each religion and mixes it all up under the auspices of unity and oneness. For a smorgasbord to the heavens visit bahai.org. If you want to keep your moral training to yourself by keeping the labels at bay, then go it alone and read more Buddhist teachings or Confucian studies to bask in the light of positivity that will then permeate your conversations in a much more subtle way.
Otherwise, continue the dialogue that begins, “some people believe … and other people believe …” You won't run into trouble until the girls get old enough to ask “and what do we believe?” It tough. For now try a new path: Put out the scotch, put on the Frank Sinatra and relive the glory days with ole‘ grannie and gramps. ¡Gracias por la vida!
— Submitted to aedgett@sierrasun.com
Let's put your pagan spirit at rest by saying this is the perfect time of year to address such a dilemma. If we turn our attentions toward México and take advantage of our local heritage we can easily pay tribute to our dearly departed with a wonderful festival: el Día de los Muertos! Granted these are a people heavily governed by their Catholic ways, and El Festival de las Calaveras (as it is also known) has spread roots throughout the church; however, the rest of us heathens can simply take what we like and toss the rest at very little moral expenditure. After all, The Day of the Dead began as an ancient Aztec celebration and many people today continue to debate its existence as a cultural tradition rather than a religious affair.
If you are lucky enough to be in México from Oct. 31 to Nov. 2 you can partake in a more public spectacle at the local cemetery, but if you are stateside you can celebrate the homecoming of your loved ones with a private ofrenda or home altar covered in offerings. El Día de los Muertos is a time to laugh in death's face, mock it, have fun with it, but also a time to give thanks for the lives of those we miss. It's a time to share memories, laugh and cry. Sugar skulls decorated with colorful frosting, pan de muerto (bread of the dead), bunches of marigolds, even hot chocolate help turn grief into acceptance. The belief is that the dead visit their families and enjoy their favorite foods, drinks, music, games, whatever has been laid out for them at the ofrenda while the living enjoy each other's company. This is togetherness and family at its best!
“The Festival of the Bones” by Luis San Vicente and “Clatter Bash” by Richard Keep are two terrific children's books that will help you learn a bit more through a great story and beautiful pictures followed by recipes and ideas. A website with really great visuals and tons more info can be found at mexconnect.com
However, this “easy answer” doesn't address the issue of where did everyone go? From where are they returning? Are they still alive somewhere else? The Bahá'í Faith is an international vision of spirituality that may help to answer questions without choosing sides. It basically takes all the best of each religion and mixes it all up under the auspices of unity and oneness. For a smorgasbord to the heavens visit bahai.org. If you want to keep your moral training to yourself by keeping the labels at bay, then go it alone and read more Buddhist teachings or Confucian studies to bask in the light of positivity that will then permeate your conversations in a much more subtle way.
Otherwise, continue the dialogue that begins, “some people believe … and other people believe …” You won't run into trouble until the girls get old enough to ask “and what do we believe?” It tough. For now try a new path: Put out the scotch, put on the Frank Sinatra and relive the glory days with ole‘ grannie and gramps. ¡Gracias por la vida!
— Submitted to aedgett@sierrasun.com


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