Grasshopper Soup: The God particle vacations in Tahoe |

Grasshopper Soup: The God particle vacations in Tahoe

TAHOE CITY, Calif. and#8212; Do you need a vacation now that all the people getting away from it all are in Tahoe, and they brought it all with them? Can you really get away from it all? Like the Tahoe local bumper sticker says, and#8220;My life is better than your vacation.and#8221; True, if only a little snobbish.

One of the most amazing things about a Tahoe vacation is that all these people actually fit, more or less, into the Tahoe Basin. No measurements are taken to compare the size of the people coming to the physical space available because thereand#8217;s plenty of room in the basin, as long as some people stand in the lake. No body weight or baggage limits are imposed, for the most part, unless you fly in. You can bring it all! And some do.

Getting away from it all in Tahoe means that, instead of standing in long lines at the movies, or creeping along in rush hour traffic in San Jose, you get stuck in traffic and see pine trees and blue sky instead of smog and rusty old railroad cars decorated with gang graffiti. Thatand#8217;s a big deal. Not everyone can appreciate the difference, if there is any.

Spotted on the back window of a truck in Tahoe City was a sticker that said, quite insightfully I might add, and#8220;Under Republicans, man exploits man. Under Democrats, itand#8217;s just the opposite.and#8221; I thought it was hilarious and want one for my car.

I ran it by a friend of mine in a local bar and got a blank stare. No laugh, no chuckle. He thought the opposite of man exploiting man was woman exploiting woman, which would be a somewhat logical conclusion, except for the fact that, under Democrats, woman exploiting woman doesnand#8217;t make any sense because Democrats, as everyone knows, are the only ones (cough, choke, excuse me), who donand#8217;t exploit women.

And Democrats, a great many of them at least, know for a fact that all conservative Republican women (excuse me, it must be the pine pollen, cough, choke) are evil, so, in light of the confusing politics of the day, the humor of the bumper sticker could go way over the head of the average citizen. It may be easier to explain what the recent scientific discovery of and#8220;The God particleand#8221; means to a crawdad. Itand#8217;s what holds everything together, like vacations.

I took the bumper sticker to mean that different men exploit different men for different reasons, depending on which party is doing the exploiting. Thatand#8217;s the only way the quote on the sticker is funny, and heaven knows we need funny in politics.

Technically, the opposite of men exploiting men is and#8230; men exploiting men! In other words, there is no opposite, no difference at all, except in terms of which men are doing the exploiting and why. Itand#8217;s all the same to a crawdad.

As far as Iand#8217;m concerned it doesnand#8217;t look like there is going to be anybody worth voting for in November. I just hope whoever wins is a funny guy, and I probably wonand#8217;t be disappointed. If a candidate can explain the quote on the sticker better than I can, and also explain the meaning of and#8220;The God particleand#8221; to a crawdad, then Iand#8217;ll vote for him.

The God particle may make it impossible to get away from it all, including politics and who exploits who. When your vacation starts to look scary, like the real world, you can always come over and hide in the closet with me. Thatand#8217;s one way to get away from it all. People who say, and#8220;Itand#8217;s all goodand#8221; donand#8217;t need to get away from it all.

Meanwhile, it seems like everyone and everything is here in Tahoe. The mountain air is warm in the shade, the sail boat races finally have wind after two weeks of cancelled races last month and most of the mountain trails are free of snow, so you can try to get away from it all in the high country. But, if the God particle has anything to say about it, you wonand#8217;t even be able to get away from it all by going to sleep!

Bob Sweigert is a Sierra Sun columnist, published poet, former college instructor and ski instructor. He has a B.A. and an M.A.T. from Gonzaga University. He has lived at Lake Tahoe for 30 years.

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