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Banning Hillary and balloons

From the Too Much Free Time file: Douglas Wallace, 80, of Reno has filed a lawsuit claiming the U.S. Constitution would have to be amended to allow Sen. Hillary Clinton to appear on the presidential ballot, according to the Associated Press.The use of female gendered pronouns she or her are not present in the document, making it conclusive that the framers never intended that a woman would be president of the United States, Wallace wrote in his suit.Legal scholars called the suit amusing but without merit.Either Mr. Wallace is a Constitutional scholar or, well, he has too much time on his hands.Meanwhile, California lawmakers are at it again, floating a trial balloon bill that would, um, ban helium-filled metallic balloons.And, no, before you get bummed out about not being able to huff helium from a balloon at your nieces birthday party and recite the Gettysburg Address ala Mickey Mouse, nixing that fun isnt the intention of the ban.Sen. Jack Scott, D-Altadena, said the party balloons frequently break free and float into power lines, where they can cause electric wires to arc. More than 200 power outages occurred last year in PGandamp;Es coverage area because of rogue balloons. Seems California legislators have already wrestled with the not-so-weighty balloon question, as a law already requires the balloons to be sold with weights to hold them down. But Scott said those weights are often candies or action figures designed to be removed by children. (How about adults trying to get at that helium).Scott’s office and Barry Broad, a lobbyist for The Balloon Council, say California would be the first state to ban the balloons. The lobbyist objects to what he calls a wacky attempt to criminalize a party toy.Not sure, though, which is wackier; a ban on balloons or the fact that there is a Balloon Council. Jamie Bate is the editor of the Sierra Sun. Reach him at jbate@sierrasun.com.


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