Pine Nuts: Finding humor in the impeachment trial |

Pine Nuts: Finding humor in the impeachment trial

McAvoy Layne

Was there humor to be found in the impeachment trial? You bet there was.

To begin, you can’t ask a senator who is used to jumping up and pontificating every five minutes to sit still and listen to somebody else for eight hours without interrupting. I couldn’t do it myself, and I’m only used to jumping up and pontificating every half hour or so.

No, when it comes to paying complete attention and listening intently, all 100 senators and yours truly suffered from attention deficit disorder during the trial, and as a group, the senate will likely enter the Guinness Book of World Records for largest group (100) to fidget nonstop the longest (six hours) straight.

Had I been representing the Great State of Nevada as senator I would have stood up four or five hours into the first hearing, stuck both index fingers into my ears, and shouted, “Bla-la-la-la-da!” Then I would have followed that by faking a stroke and letting them carry me out on a gurney regardless of the cost, because as a senator you know I would have ample insurance to cover such emergencies.

It’s no longer us-against-them in this world of ours, it’s us-against-us.

And yes, there was a light-hearted moment when Rep. Hakeem Jefferies suggested, “Perhaps we can all agree to subpoena the Baseball Hall of Fame to try to find out who voted against Derek Jeter.”

It was interesting to me that during the trial, smoke from Australia’s fires traveled all the way around the world and back again to Australia. What does that tell us? It tells us in visual terms that a 2020 citizen’s country is in fact the entire world. We are still a couple hundred sovereign nations, but we are also one social organism attempting to save ourselves from ourselves.

For those too young to remember, a country we once dropped nuclear bombs on, Japan, we visit today to admire their culture, ski Mt. Fuji, and soak in a hot tub while drinking hot sake. It’s no longer us-against-them in this world of ours, it’s us-against-us.

Should Pakistan and India get into it tomorrow they will not be shooting pulao peas at each other across their border, they will be dropping N-bombs on each other, and remember those winds that carried Australian smoke all the way around the world and back to Australia? Well, welcome to 2020, we have reached a tipping point where our weapons are too big to succeed.

But I digress … getting back to humor, yes, there was humor in the impeachment trial, but you would lose a week’s worth of sleep trying to find it. It was mostly theater, opera, and what’s an opera without tragedy. I shall leave the last word here to Mark Twain as I am wont to do …

“To create man was a quaint and original idea; but to add the sheep was tautology.”

Learn more about McAvoy Layne at

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