Last week’s column reminded me of a love affair out there on Old Cape Cod…

To punish me I guess, our program director at WOCB sent me to a resort to host a remote broadcast of a backgammon tournament on a Sunday afternoon. My first reaction, which I kept to myself, was, “You’re condemning me to death by a thousand papercuts. I don’t even know how to spell backgammon!”

Well, I went, and that was this boy’s lucky day, for mine eyes fell upon her. She wore a fuzzy yellow sweater that highlighted the ringlets of dark curls that adorned her shoulders. I was bewitched, bewildered and speechless. But girding my courage, I approached her with microphone in hand, and asked if I could interview her.

She waved both hands to shoo me away, then placed an index finger to her lips to signal she was speech impaired, which she was not… 

I fell irretrievably in love with her, set down my microphone, and asked if I could buy her an iced tea. She smiled and said yes. I then worked up my courage to ask her for a date on Monday evening for dinner and a show, to wit she told me she already had a date to attend the Bruins game. I was crushed, but she also told me she worked at a dress shop in Hyannis, so at least I knew where I might find her. Jane was her name.

That Monday evening I went to a new friend’s house for Monday Night Football and was put in charge of burgers on the grill outside. I shared with my new friends that the love of my new life, Jane, was at the Bruins game and my life was ruined.  Then, while I was outside tending the grill, I heard, “McAvoy, come in here! We switched over to the Bruins game during halftime, and a beautiful lady stood up in the stands with a sign that said, “I Love You, McAvoy!”

“Heaven take me now!” I howled, then returned to my grill with a smile and a spring in my step.

The next day I wandered downtown to look for her dress shop, found it, and there she was, looking gorgeous.

“That was really something special that you did last night.” I stammered.

“And what was that?” she sang along innocently.

“You know, the sign…”

“The sign?”

Abruptly, I realized I had been hoodwinked, and I resolved to avenge those who sent me on this fool’s errand…

But what was gratifying and memorable about that hoodwinking is what she did next. Once she realized that I had been bamboozled by my friends in such a cruel manner, she purloined from my program director, my Boston Marathon training route, went out there one morning, and planted a hand painted sign alongside my route that read, “I love you McAvoy!”  Well, when I came upon that sign my heart stopped beating and leaped into my throat…

         To be continued…